17 October
     This was all supposed to happen next week, but plans got changed somewhere along the line. Bad point was that it ended up costing me a bit more for the ticket, good point was I got real sweet flight times. So, instead of getting up at around half-three for a six o’clock flight I’m getting up at about half-six for a ten o’clock. Cool, more time to pack and treble-check that I’ve got everything, and my "Eight Legged Freaks" soundtrack comes w/ the early mail so I even get a chance to hear a few tracks while I’m prepping.
    Flights were fairly uneventful. Amsterdam failed to get us out on time (surprise. Not.) and we got our a$$es kicked going over Lake Huron on our path to Detroit but apart from that, nowt special. Didn’t even get pulled for a random check at the airports like last time. Maybe I’m losing my appeal….Detroit Metro is pretty cool, the terminus has a monorail thingy running INSIDE it. I’ve got about an hour-and-a-half before my flight so I go to the Rag Top café for a dog and a drink - no Root Beer! Boo! Thirty minutes on American soil and my first sulk.
    When I get into Sky Harbour, I use the courtesy phone to call a Best Western that has something about airports in its title, and they tell me they don’t have a rez for me. That was a bit worrying. Turns out that it’s the BW near THIS airport, not the BW at the small airport where we usually stay. Which isn’t listed coz it doesn’t have a courtesy bus, apparently. Outside it’s about 82 degrees (at nine PM - damn, we had hailstones here just before I left) and I get the Super Shuttle to the BW - it’s a canny trip, no mooks who don’t know the address of where they wanna go. They got a rez for me - cool! - but the guy on the desk refuses to give me room numbers for anyone else, something to do w/ their privacy rules or some crap. This doesn’t help when I find out Kev ain’t booked in under his name so I dunno how to find him. After a bit of persuading, the guy connects me to a room associated w/ "Chaos! Comics" and I leave a message on the phone. Since he won’t even tell me the name, I don’t know who I’m leaving the message for. No one’s around so I just loiter on the balcony and wait for people to show up. It’s a nice night anyways.
    Around eleven, they show up and we all hang around in their room, 120, which becomes like the official hang-out room. Kev Southwell and the She-Wolf are there w/ Bugg and Kip, and the ever-present Japman. Fkn cool reunion. Great to see Turtle again too. New guy of the group is tatt artist Wish, cool person and excellent inker. They had a good flight too, fortunate since most of them hate flying. Kev has his scrapbook and photo album w/ him - it’s excellent, some awesome bits and pieces in it. Kinda makes me wish I’d kept one myself. Drunken God Erik turns up w/ Tara and we talk a fair way past midnight. Aways back we got a mail from Crow saying he couldn’t make it due to car trouble and stuff. Kev told him he’s produced a special fest book containing the script for the unpublished "Lady Death/Crow" book and the only way to get a copy is to turn up here. He’s on his way. I got a copy of my Chic photos for Kev and Mandy, and for some reason I get a lot of p*ss-taking over my pics of the She-Wolf…
    We finally split up for the night and plan to get some breakfast at around seven.

18 October
    Jet-lagged again : wake up at five-fifteen like a switch has been thrown, and despite having had about four hours sleep after a twenty-eight hour day my body just flatly refuses to go back to sleep. I lie there and pretend for a while, then call Kev for breakfast. It’s quite amazing - most everyone is up and about. We head over to get breakfast, which sucks compared to last year. The hotel seems to have gone downhill a bit : there’s bugger-all in the souvenir shop and the snacks consist of mini pizzas or mini pizzas. Breakfast options are limited too, they’ve cut down on the types of bread available etc, and the prices for side dishes are outrageous. Kev, Kip, She-Wolf and I get all the places at one table, prompting Bugg to head to a nearby empty table muttering "I’ll just sit over here w/ my friends…". Kev manages to jam a bagel in the toaster and almost starts a fire, which woulda been amusing.
    Erik, Tara and her kid Max turn up around 9:20, to head out to the Tonto Natural Bridge. Bee was gonna come w/ us, but she ain’t feeling grand. Mandy’s allergies are playing up too, the dry AZ climate doesn’t agree w/ her. The next bit is fun : trying to fit nine people into one truck. We manage it, but after a while we think it’ll be much better to get another vehicle so we stop at Tara’s and get her truck. Pity, I kinda liked having She-Wolf sitting on my knee.
    It’s a long drive out there, and we stop of for something to eat at a McDonald’s (and THEY don’t have root beer either! What a gyp!), then take a breather at a rest area. It’s a weird place : there’s two signs - one warns of deadly snakes and insects, and the other says to exercise your pets there. Doing their part to feed the local wildlife I guess. When we finally get to the place it is absolutely awesome. Gorgeous. I never realised there was so much natural greenery in AZ, it’s almost like we’ve gone into another state. The bridge is huge, and there are hiking trails around and below it, so we head off and do a sht load of walking (surprise). There are some amazing caves that Kev explores and some massive boulders and rocks lying about that Kip manages to scale : she keeps wandering off and you next see her on top of a massive rock in the middle of the stream. While we’re out there we get a call from Crow who has turned up at the hotel : typical planning - we persuade someone to come 1500 miles, then bugger off for the day.
    Prez has arranged a meet-and-greet thingy w/ BP at six so we finish up at the Bridge and head back. Tara takes off to take Max home and we all pile into Erik’s truck again to head back. It should be straight forward, but once again, Killer’s First Law of Fiend Plans works its magic. We’re heading up the highway on what shoulda been a straight run back, when all of a sudden we hit a police roadblock : they got the whole road closed off completely and divert us up a side road - there’s no diversion signs to follow and guide you back to where you wanted to be so we flounder desperately for a half-hour or so on both sides of the highway, all around the Clinic area and a private estate - it’s like the fkn twilight zone thingy, where no matter where drive you always end up at the same place. Finally Erik manages to weave his way back onto the right road, but the net result is we’re all real late for the meet-and-greet. We dive back to 120 to get a drink and stuff, and Crow turns up. He’s bought a way cool gift for me - a knife he carved out of ash. It’s gorgeous - light, strong and w/ a foot-long kris blade on it. I’m itching to try it out, but Jap ain’t here…We head out to the pool and hang out w/ BP, Adam, Prez and family, Ted and Michelle, and Sindy and Gil have turned up too, w/ some of the goodies they snagged at the bankruptcy auction. We shoot the sht for a few hours and by the time I go to bed at around 1:30 my back is giving me severe sht, despite a couple of happy squeezes from She-Wolf.

19 October
    After breakfast we chill and chat until noon, when BP turns up w/ his binders and stuff. I thought my back had eased up a bit, but after an hour or so I have to take a break to get a couple of my heavy-duty ibuprofens, which seem to do the trick. BP hands out copies of his draft script for "Lady Death/Evil Ernie" and Kev hands out his Fest book - it’s a fkn awesome piece of work, almost half an inch thick w/ the scripts for two Purgatori books, an ICP book, Lady Death/Crow and an article by Josh Dysart. After that we chill at the pool side and share a 6 foot sub sandwich, and the CF’s present BP, Ted and I w/ awesome embroidered jackets. I’m knocked out - it’s a fantastic gift, w/ my name embroidered on the breast too.
    Turtle turns up, only about four hours late, and we all head off to Armando’s for a party. I get a lift over w/ Ted and Michelle and we stop off at the local supermarket to grab some party goodies. Armando and his wife are fantastic hosts and we have a complete blast. When we come (three carloads of people, heh) in he’s trying to get the barbecue going, but it just seems to want to shower sparks everywhere like some wierdie firework. Bee turns up w/ some of Steven’s awesome artwork. I give in to temptation and snag another Purgatori piece from "Between Heaven & Hell". There’s a lovely Leviatha piece, from the tribute book, but I’m tapped out at the minute so I have to leave it, but Bee says she’ll keep it aside until I have time to sort my finances. Armando and Wish have a wad of stuff  for sale too, there’s some way cool rare stuff up for grabs, and  Armando gives me a cool red Iced Earth T-shirt w/ my girl on it, which was good of him. The entire party is fkn awesome, and hilarious. We find out Armando turns invisible when his wife has been drinking ("Don’t shut the garage! Leave the garage door open! Hey! Don’t -" clunk). He’s got a mental dog too - it runs over and starts licking my leg. Sees my barbecue chips and tries to climb up me to get at them.
    When we finally break up at about half-one we find we’ve run out of drivers. Prez, Ted and Turtle have all left, most of the others have been drinking a LOT and Erik is…otherwise engaged. Finally we get Wish to drive the girlies back and Armando takes the rest of us in his truck. It’s a blast, hurtling down the highway in the back of his truck but weird too : it’s pretty damn cold at that speed, but at one point, for no reason at all, we pass through a real warm patch that feels like someone turned a hair drier on, and there’s no obvious reason for the sudden change.
    Back in 120, Kip and She-Wolf go to sleep and Kev, Bugg, Wish and I sit and chill for a few hours, and they teach me a few English words NOT to say in polite company. Crow goes AWOL and we can’t find him. Jap turns up and checks his room and the pool, but can’t find him either. We just talk the night away, and some hours later Jap discovers Crow : asleep in the pool hot tub, where he’s been for about three hours. Dunno why Jap didn’t find him earlier. Guess it was hard to see him through all that water…Fortunately he fell asleep sitting up against the tub wall, or we mighta had our first Fest Death.
    I decide to call it a night. I get up, say my goodbyes, get talking and end up sitting down again : by the time we all decide to break up it’s half-five. If we hadn’t already got breakfast plans we probably woulda just stayed another half-hour then gone to the restaurant.

20 October
    Sunday already - the last day we’ll have together. I get up at nine-thirty and head off to 120. We’re due to head over to The Good Egg for a Fiend Breakfast, which is just as well because by the time everyone’s up and about the restaurant is closed. I get a ride over w/ BP and everyone’s turned up, including Fran, who we don’t see enough of this weekend. I owe Bee money for the art, but it’s a repeat of the last time I bought stuff from her : none of the fricking ATMs will deal w/ me - they just say "unable to complete the transaction" but won’t tell me WHY. Grr! Best point of the meal is watching Crow make his home-made "lemonade" : a glass of water, a slice of lemon from the water jug, and about a dozen packets of white sugar. The raw sugar he just eats straight from the packet. Bugg takes pity on him and gives him some of his pancakes.
    When we get back to the hotel we sit and chat w/ BP for a few hours then we say our goodbyes and he heads off. Erik and Bee turn up, and we gather in the room for my second knock-out of the weekend : they all chipped in to get me the Leviatha piece. I’m floored, and being the shy person I am probably turned the same colour as my girl. I am absolutely lost for words.
After that we get ourselves organised and get a last few group pics, since Prez is heading out. Ted and Michelle head out somewhere and the rest of us pile into cars to get a meal at Cooperstown. We don’t know exactly where it is but Erik finds it by accident and we park up and go in for another great meal. After that we go on a wander and instead of the haunted house this year we end up at the Hard Rock Café. She-Wolf starts on the tequila ("to kill ya") shots, which might not be a good idea since they wanna do an all-nighter due to their flight being at 9 in the AM tomorrow. While we’re wandering I try another three ATMs and still none of them will play. This is getting stale. On the way back to the car we stop outside Cooperstown for group pics and Tara’s Hard Rock mug gets smashed. She says she’ll take it back and get it exchanged - we all doubt they’ll have anything to do w/ that, but she comes back a few minutes later w/ a grin and a new mug. Humph, bet they wouldn’t’ve changed it for ME!
    We get back to 120 and sit and chill out, drinking, smoking and just having a good time. Jap has his laptop and burns us copies of his photos. Mandy’s still doing the tequila and is mid-way through the second bottle by the time I have to leave.

21 October
    I grab three hours and call them at five - no reply. Hmmm. I wander over to the room and it’s all dark. They were talking about heading out somewhere, so I hang about a bit but no one turns up. I wander back to my room for a bit and when I next check the door’s open. Kip is up but hasn’t been able to rouse the others. I go in to try and wake them, making sure the doors are open and my exit is clear : I’ve dealt w/ a sleepy She-Wolf before…She’s utterly zonked this time. Kev gets up and by the time he’s washed and dressed she still hasn’t stirred much. I tell her Erik’s gonna be there in about an hour or so. "Yeah, ok," she growls, not opening her eyes. "Go away." I do. I’m not daft.
    We get some breakfast and Erik turns up to drive Kev and Mandy and Bugg and Kip to the airport. We say farewell to Jap and Crow and I squeeze in for the ride. The airport is fairly quiet : last year they were still on the post-9/11 frenzy and the place was packed, w/ suitcases being opened all over the place and guards everywhere. This time the queue is shorter but Erik finds the kerb check-in is completely empty so we dive out there and get sorted in record time. Now it’s time to say goodbye, and it sucks as always. As usual, I can’t believe it’s been four days, seems to fly over. We do like eighteen hour days at least, and we still hardly seem to have spent a lot of time together. We never end got to fire Crow’s champagne at anything. Last hugs and photos and then they’re off. I head over to a Bank of America machine, the only kind that worked last time,  and it doesn’t let me down - I’m finally able to settle my debt w/ Bee. Erik drives me back to the hotel and gets road-raged at by some doof who wants to get somewhere real urgently, it seems. Erik’s way cool - he’s done a sht-load of running around for us this weekend and stuff and won’t take anything for gas money or whatever. So, next time we meet, I’m taking care of his drinks.
After he leaves I’ve got an hour or so to do a slow leisurely pack and order a Super Shuttle - just as well, coz they tell me it’ll be there at eleven-twenty. It’s an easy run to the Sky Harbour and I get checked in just as easy, then it’s just a matter of a couple hours wait for my first plane. The flights home are pretty uneventful too - change in Memphis and by the time we reach Europe it’s - surprise! - misty and wet. Fricking cold at home too, unless I just got acclimatised to the AZ weather. I’m walking outta Newcastle baggage claim and I get stopped by the customs guy wanting me to open the case - this is the first time this has ever happened, and I have a foot-long blade in my case. It’s wedged at the back of my case wrapped in a T-shirt, and he does a somewhat apathetic search and misses it completely. Heh!

    The usual shout-outs :
    Erik, for ferrying us about all over the place;
    Tara, for the same, and not being scared any more ;-)
    Bee, for hanging and hooking me up w/ the Purgatori art;
    Prez, for getting my pics there safely, and indeed getting me them;
    Armando and his wife, for a cool party;
    Crow, Kip and Bugg, for turning up and making the weekend great;
    BP, for hanging out again;
    Kev and the She-Wolf, for being two of the coolest friends I have;
    …and to everybody involved in giving me the jacket and the Leviatha art : it means more than I can say.

    I’ll leave you w/ a few Fest quotes - names removed to protect the innocent. I probably forgot a few, but these are the gems that stuck in my mind :-
    "Tickle the tarantula."
    "Shut up for half an hour, so I don’t have to hate you all the time."
    "What’s that on your shirt? Is that Casper, w/out a face, behind Ernie..?"
    "He’s dumb as a box of rocks."
    "I’ve got an idea…I just don’t know about what…"
and my favourite :
    "Don’t start w/ me, or I’ll fk you up."